I sat down in the theater with my buttery popcorn and extra-large soda – the floor was sticky and the seat was soft and cool to my bare naked ass. There was a lady in front of me that smelled like dog biscuits – her hair was in a bun and there were dried peaches on her shoulder. There was a large man in short shorts behind me and in his bright yellow bag next to him there was a sedated cat that was part of his murderous routine of drugging alley cats and bringing them to the movie theater to be strangled. Then the lights dimmed and I experienced what would fast become another forgettable movie that I’m super excited to tell you all about right now!
I’m sorry – I’m sick of this Journalism 101 painting the scene of whatever. Sick of hearing some bullshit that has nothing to do with what people are writing about – I don’t care about your physical experience with whatever happens before – tell me the actual experience of it all.
Upon meeting my hero for the first time – I cut my toe nails in the shape of his name – shave my forearms – ate a 12 lb turkey and basted my crotch with garlic sauce. My hero came striding confidently into the room while eating what appeared to be an elderly man’s shoe. He sat down and started complaining that the chair was not rust colored like he requested – and began to belch big gassy burps that had the faint smell of vanilla and elm trees all while he checked his belly button for lost Smarties Candies.
As much as I painted an interesting picture for you – you’ll never really know what the physical experience was actually – the reader is not there. I am guilty of it – I’m sure – but I try to steer away from it at a crutch.
I’m just raging on because I’m reading too much lately – I need to start watching more stuff – reading is stupid.
I’m sorry – I’m sick of this Journalism 101 painting the scene of whatever. Sick of hearing some bullshit that has nothing to do with what people are writing about – I don’t care about your physical experience with whatever happens before – tell me the actual experience of it all.
Upon meeting my hero for the first time – I cut my toe nails in the shape of his name – shave my forearms – ate a 12 lb turkey and basted my crotch with garlic sauce. My hero came striding confidently into the room while eating what appeared to be an elderly man’s shoe. He sat down and started complaining that the chair was not rust colored like he requested – and began to belch big gassy burps that had the faint smell of vanilla and elm trees all while he checked his belly button for lost Smarties Candies.
As much as I painted an interesting picture for you – you’ll never really know what the physical experience was actually – the reader is not there. I am guilty of it – I’m sure – but I try to steer away from it at a crutch.
I’m just raging on because I’m reading too much lately – I need to start watching more stuff – reading is stupid.
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